WTF

In which we see the seeds of not swatching bear their bitter fruit

Or, I would feel loathsome if not for the tricksy tricksy decreases




Shedir from Knitty
(Which is a brilliant, extremely well-written and clever pattern, which you should knit despite my experience. Did I mention that the decreases were the most fun I've had all year?)
Naturespun Worsted in Stone (Did I consider Calmer? Ha! Cotton and acrylic? Are you fucking serious?)
Bryspun #4


That's right. I didn't swatch and now I am forced to eat my own limbs in shame.

Can I tell you a secret? I rarely, if ever, swatch. I mean, what do I knit? Hats. Socks. Shawls. Mittens. How can a shawl not fit? How would I swatch for a sock? A small, round tube - why not just knit the damn thing? If it doesn't work, I'll rip it out and start over again. I don't see why that should bother me any more than knitting three swatches.

Here that has come to bite me in the ass, but only because I make things more complicated than they need to be.


Round one: I like slouchy hats. (I already have perpetual helmet hair, I don't need hat hair to compound the problem.) I cast on an extra pattern repeat on #3s.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

I have never experienced pain while knitting before, but that was before I used Prym metal circs. May the gods of your pantheon cast down whoever invited those foul things. I curse them to the depths of the foulest sea. Seriously. Shooting pains through my arms, shoulders, hands. Could barely knit a row without collapsing. Hands hurt for weeks; still hurt, actually. EVIL, EVIL PRYM. STAY AWAY. CURSE THE PRYM.

Round two: I purchase #4 Bryspun circ and DPNs. I like Bryspun, a lot, they are glorious and cheap and I figured they would save my ailing hands (I know, I should have stopped knitting until the pain was gone). Round #1 was also a bit too small, so I added yet another pattern repeat. (That was my mistake. Also, I didn't do the ribbing on a smaller needle. Blast.)


Which gave me a hat that would fit the Hulk. To be obstinate, I would like to point out that it is mostly too tall, which is not the fault of gauge, but of misunderestimating the height that the decreases add.

My fashionable roommate suggests wearing it like this. I think that looks pretty cute.





But it's probably going to get the rip. The decreases were so fun I (probably?) wouldn't mind knitting it again.




But not now. Right now, I don't feel like knitting. At all. I also don't feel like eating the Ben & Jerry's I just purchases, so clearly I have gone completely fucking insane.